(By: MARY E. ADAMS)

The other night, as I was driving to church, it was already dark. Yet there were faint shades of pink on the tops of the mountains as a fading sun retreated behind me. The stars would be especially brilliant in the cold, clear arctic air. As it was now December and Christmastime, I thought about that star that long ago led some wise men to load up their camels with provisions and gifts and head in its direction toward Palestine. It must have been a spectacular site...that star. Balaam had prophesied about it in Numbers 24:17: "I shall see Him, but not now: I shall behold Him, but not nigh: There shall come a Star out of Jacob, and a Scepter shall rise out of Israel". Perhaps that was why these wise men asked Herod the King, "Where is He that is born King of the Jews? For we have seen His star in the east, and are come to worship Him".

But my thoughts quickly drifted off in another direction. That star...God had created it billions of light-years before for that special purpose...to announce the arrival of His Son. In His infinite wisdom and power, He had calculated the exact time in the exact place for it to shine with that particular brilliance. But it could not come forth until the passing of eons of time,  through long journeys of empty space and dangerous objects hidden in millions of galaxies. It was not a star like Jude spoke of;  wandering stars, (shooting stars) that appeared in the sky only to fly off into eternal oblivion, but a star with a PURPOSE, hidden in God's plan. It would never depart from its course.

Who am I, but a speck of dust...lodged on planet earth? My time has come, but one day will be gone. Life is only a preparation for death, and it was decided eons ago when I would appear, and when I would leave...just as that star. And so it was, that I felt a sudden quickening in my spirit when the speaker for that evening service opened his sermon with a quote from Daniel 12: 

"And many of them that sleep in the dust of the earth shall awake,

some to everlasting life, and some to shame and everlasting contempt.

And they that be wise shall shine as the brightness of the firmament;

and they that turn many to righteousness as the stars

forever and ever".

Most of you who have been receiving my writings know that for the past 8 months, I have been undergoing chemotherapy for cancer. During these eight months, I began to see this experience as just one of many that have brought me through times of learning. This month, I will be finished with the treatments, and I feel very, very good. I am anxious to return to the work God has for me.  And so, during this season of separation, I felt I should let my dear friends come along with me on this journey. How wonderful it has been to receive so many letters in return, from people who have been encouraged and helped in their personal struggles with disease and sickness. I do know this: God is a healer, and wants us well. But I am also aware of the testings and trials He sometimes allows.

Personally, I believe the story of Job was written for that very reason. I began to re-read this powerful story once again. For here we find that God allowed Job, a man He himself declares to be "perfect and upright", to be touched  with physical disease and suffer the loss of his children and personal wealth. Satan recognized that as a truthful fact, but put forth the notion that the only reason Job served God was for the benefits of these blessings...that if these things were suddenly withdrawn, Job would "curse God to His face." So God allowed this to be proven in Job's life.

How often I have seen people turn from God when trials come. "If God were truly a God of love, would He then let me suffer?"  "If God loves us so much, how come He allowed my son to die...He could have prevented it!"  "If God was so merciful, why did He do this and that..." "God does not love me...He does not answer my prayers"..."After all I have done, God let me suffer loss." Once faithful and God-fearing saints that suddenly run the opposite direction, forsaking the church and becoming bitter and disillusioned...out of fellowship with God's people.

I recognized these were all the same questions addressed as Job lay sick and diseased in sackcloth and ashes, his goods taken by robbers, his children destroyed in a storm. His own wife urged him to do exactly what Satan had told God that Job would do: "End it all! "Curse God and die!" 

In many countries of the world, people daily put sacrifices of food and light incense in front of their idol altars, hoping to gain favor from their gods. The quest for good fortune is so extreme that people pay thousands of dollars just to have certain "good luck" numbers on their license plates! So when someone meets with misfortune and sickness, they are often considered to have done some great sin or offended their gods in some way. And as the story of Job unfolds, we find that the men who came to "comfort" him, had the same thoughts in mind...Job had committed some hidden and unconfessed sin which had brought upon him the wrath of God. Yet Job knew he had done nothing worthy of such an extreme punishment.

You who read these words and are at this time suffering from disease and sickness or other misfortunes, may recognize much of what I have written. Your mind  has unanswered questions, and like Job, consider the arguments. Job thought of death, and wished he had never been born. He cried for a personal audience with God where he might "order my cause before him and fill my mouth with arguments." Yet God had remained silent. Yet never, for one instance, had God's promise of healing and restoration been taken  away. His blessings had merely been withdrawn for a season, to prove him...to answer Satan's statement.

A friend reminded me of Abraham...whom God called His "friend."  In every aspect of his life, Abraham had put God first...yet God had withheld from him the desire of his heart...for a son. And when he finally miraculously gave him one when he was an old man, He later was asked to sacrifice him on an altar to prove that Abraham would obey him, no matter the situation. The test went to the very moment that Abraham stretched forth his hand and took the knife to slay his son. Then the angel of the Lord suddenly spoke, "lay not thine hand upon the lad, neither do thou anything unto him; for now I know that thou fearest God, seeing thou hast not withheld thy son, thine only son from Me."

I have a dear friend in India, Francis Jackson. He was a good Christian man, serving God. But he wanted to become an engineer, and studied to obtain a degree. One day, the professor announced the date for the final exam...on Saturday. There would be only one exam...if you missed it, you did not pass. But in the meantime, during prayer, the Lord spoke to Francis: "I want you to go to the mountain on Saturday...I will meet you there". An awesome thing! Yet Francis was in a quandary...of course he wanted to meet God, but he also wanted to pass the exam for that degree! What to do? As he debated the issue, it came down to the point of decision. Francis decided to go to the mountain. As he climbed to the top, suddenly he was engulfed with a cloud, and God spoke to him that He was calling Him to serve Him. Then the lower half of Jesus' body came through the cloud. He saw Jesus' nail scarred hands! And the Lord gave him an experience in the Holy Spirit that lasted well over two hours. It was then that Francis yielded his life to serving God.

As he came down the mountain, his brother was running to meet him. "Francis!  the school called. There has been a cancellation of the test today!" Even today Francis recalls with horror how easily he could have missed this experience.

God loves us enough to allow trials and tests. He never tempts us, but he will sometimes test us in order to confirm our faith or prove our commitment... taking us deeper into an understanding of His love. James wrote: "Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 

"Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him."

Would God allow these kinds of tests in OUR lives? We have no reason to think otherwise, for Satan will fight to the bitter end to destroy our faith and trust in God, especially those (as Eliphaz remarked) who have been "the instructors of many, who have strengthened the weak hands of others, and upheld those with faltering and feeble knees"...his dedicated servants! It is also always God's will for us to "prosper and be in health". I KNOW the healing power of God! He has healed me so many times, sometimes instantly, and seen others miraculously healed in an instant of time. But I also believe that because we pray and are not instantly healed, this does not mean we have a God who has abandoned us, for this would deny His promise to never do that.

Job's suffering would soon end. God would restore his health and return double his losses. The accusations, the anger, the frustration, the self-pity, would come to an end as well. Job said, "My ears had heard of you, but now my eyes have seen you. Therefore I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes". We who are of the household of faith must also come to full maturity...not only to have heard of Him and to have memorized certain sweet promises, but to see Him with the eyes of faith and spiritual understanding...which means we can therefore accept God's plan for our lives...which may also includes times of suffering.

Having weathered this present "storm" in my life, I know now that the battle was not so much about my sickness as it was about steadfast faith. Not the kind of "faith" that is pumped up with favorite memorized scripture. Nor "faith" that  lasts only until we feel God has abandoned us and no longer works in our behalf. Not "faith" that crumbles apart when our greatest treasures of this life are taken from us and we seemingly have no friend or family who knows our suffering. But a faith that sees God's plan in everything, and continues on, despite any perception of denied justice. 

It is then that we obtain an awareness and understanding that we, like the Star of Bethlehem, were created with purpose...and that our awesome, all-knowing Father's plan, as Daniel wrote, is to "make us shine like the brightness of the heavens and its stars as we lead others to righteousness". 

We must consider our thoughts about God's dealings...they will either continue us on our way to fulfilling His ultimate purpose, or lead us to become wandering stars in the abyss of blackness we chose for ourselves.  

"Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed, not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence--continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act according to his good purpose. Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe...." (Philippians 2:12-15)

DEAR READER: Thank you for taking the time to read this. If it has ministered hope, encouragement or insight to you in any way, would you please take the time to send Mary Adams a quick E-mail at meamin@mtaonline.net and share the blessing with her? She would love to hear from you!  

If this testimony has touched you in some special way, would you please share it with us? Email us at:  ptoffice@precious-testimonies.com 

PLEASE HELP US HELP YOU SHARE THE BEST NEWS GOD HAS FOR EVERY PERSON BECAUSE...

JESUS DID IT! and...

YOU ARE SO GREATLY NEEDED!

Remember: All that we do in this life comes back to our God-given purpose which is to serve and glorify God. The money and assets we accumulate, the fame and power we've attained or seek to attain - all of the things of this nature will one day pass away, but those lives of others we impact for Jesus Christ will last for eternity, and we will be rewarded for the part we helped play by impacting those lives ... for eternity. (Matthew 6:19-21 is our assurance)