I Was A Troubled Military Vet Looking For Happiness

(By: Norm Rasmussen)

At age 18, I enlisted in the Army. A few days before Christmas of 1967, I landed foot on the shores of South Vietnam, full of fear and apprehension. In Vietnam, I was assigned to be a Prisoner-Of-War interrogator at the field level. Our main objective was to help save the lives of our fellow soldiers by providing accurate and timely information about the enemies' activities. We were also trying to stop the Communists from taking over South Vietnam. In seeking information from prisoners, "creative interrogation techniques" were sometimes used that inflicted a lot of pain. These techniques were designed to extract information from hard-core prisoners. Otherwise, they wouldn't reveal information they had. This helped deaden my conscience to the value of life I may have had prior to going to Vietnam.

As all combat vets do, I experienced first-hand the horrors and injustices of war. My concept of an "all loving, all merciful, all compassionate God” being in control of this planet drastically began to alter my belief about Him. Seeing all the pain the Vietnam conflict was bringing to the lives of so many people, including mine, I wasn't sure I wanted to put my trust in any supposed God who allowed such things to happen.

In order to put the whole nightmare behind me and get on with my life as best I could, I came back from Vietnam a hard-core alcoholic and chronic smoker. I had a heart as cold as steel. My wife had an emotionally unstable and troubled husband to deal with, although I certainly was in denial to that. I was thankful to be alive, but I left Vietnam very emotionally troubled.

I was quick to find fault in Christians and organized religion as well. I was totally unaware of the devil's influence over my thinking. Like many others, I felt that all churches wanted was to try to control you and con you out of your money.

Alcoholism, anger, emotional instability, and stress continued to take their ugly toll on me. Near age 35, I was told unexpectedly by a nurse that my heart was like a walking time bomb, ready to explode. My heart was ready to quit any minute due to extreme high blood pressure. I was sleeping very little, smoking three packs of cigarettes a day, and drinking beer, wine, and close to half a fifth of hard liquor each day. I was trying to cope with both emotional and physical pain. I had started developing severe back and leg issues by that time as well.

When I was told that I had to quit smoking and drinking or else suffer a heart attack, part of me didn't care if I died. In my mind, it was a way out of my pain and misery. After all, it would be death through "natural causes." Who would ever know the real reason?

So by 1980, near age 35, I was a wreck. I was facing death by my own choosing. I wasn't convinced in my heart that I would go to heaven. My marriage had essentially dissolved. My life was in shambles. I had two precious children who did not have a suitable father and an emotionally strained wife who did not have a suitable husband. I had reached a place in my life where I felt like death seemed the only way out, yet I really didn't want to die either. All I really wanted was to have a purpose for living that I just wasn't able to find, no matter how hard I tried, and a little happiness that lasted longer than another drug-induced high.

Despair descended upon me, and fear of dying began to suddenly plague my thoughts. What if there really was a heaven and a hell? How could I actually prove there wasn't? If there actually was a heaven and a hell, once on the other side, what assurance did I have of having a second chance to get right with God? All I had ever done was live for myself. What would God find in me that would make Him want to let me be in heaven with Him? I had no valid reasons I could come up with. My despair eventually turned to desperation.

That night – after the nurse informed me of my dangerous high blood pressure - I cried out to God all night long, starting on a Thursday night with nothing happening. Friday evening, I went to bed like I had done the night before. I started crying out to Jesus Christ again, “If there is a Jesus Christ who can hear me or wants to hear me, let me know You are real! I do want to serve the real God, but I've got to know You are real! I've got to know that what the Bible says about You is true! I've got to know if You really care for me!" I cried and agonized to God until the wee hours of dawn, but all I heard was silence. "God, do You even hear me?"

More silence … I finally gave up. What a fool I felt I had been to cry out like this all night long. I rationalized, thinking that maybe God would have compassion on me and somehow reveal His reality to me in a way that I wasn't so doubtful and confused about Him. But nothing.

Daybreak was just starting that early Saturday morning, and then it happened! The bedroom instantly became about 30% brighter. I looked for a light to be on but none was! I thought maybe the sun was now up. I thought maybe I had fallen asleep and had awakened hours later, but the clock said differently. No, I wasn't imagining it, nor was I dreaming it. The light was real! It was of equal intensity throughout the room. An invisible presence was in my room. The reason I know so was because an indescribable love was so strong in that room that it seemed there was not enough room to contain it all! I felt like I was being shoved back by a big hand into my bed, the love was so strong. And I knew…don't ask me how I knew…I just knew that I knew that it was the presence of Jesus Christ in my room!

At that moment, He spoke very powerfully to me. It wasn’t audibly but powerfully to my inner being. (I've come to realize He spoke to my spirit, which is a common way for Him to speak to people). The intensity of it was so strong that it might just as well have been audible. He told me what I had to do to make my relationship work with Him. Instantly all the anguish, pain, misery, confusion and doubt of a lifetime were sucked out of me. All that was left was peace and knowing that God is real.

The room instantly was darkened again as before. The presence of Christ was now gone. The whole thing didn't take more than a few brief moments to happen but happen it did! I was now a believer! Moments later, I pulled the covers off from me, sat on the side of the bed, and made a solemn vow to God. I said, "Thank you, Lord, for revealing Yourself to me in a way that I can believe in You. I know I don't deserve what has just happened here, and I promise to serve You the rest of my life. I'll do whatever You ask me to do."

I’m only being honest in saying that I owe God everything for what He did to help me realize who He truly was and is. He has granted me the desire of my heart, which is to give me a purpose for living. I have His eternal purpose in mind, which is to be used of Him to tell others about who Jesus Christ truly is and what He did for me on the cross, and to help new Christians gain a more solid foundation on which to build THEIR relationship with Jesus Christ on.

If you are as skeptical as I once was about the importance of serving Jesus Christ, all I can suggest is that you get as desperate as you know how to seek Him and never stop seeking Him. Ask Him to reveal to you who He truly is and what He did for you. A great deal of the time, God doesn't come through for us like we might like Him to until we get desperate enough. I believe He will often force us to come to a place of desperation before He manifests Himself to us because most people won't really serve Him all that much (afterwards) once He begins to reveal Truth about Himself to them unless it truly costs them something. That cost? Pain. Pain has a way of making you appreciate what is truly valuable.

Please allow me to insert some very important reality to those who are bound up in doubt and unbelief about being BLINDED to biblical spiritual truth like I was. One of the most priceless things God has done for me is to free me to understand that there is an intense spiritual battle going on in the unseen spirit realm to influence the thinking of mankind. Satan and the demons who serve him are not “made up – make believe – characters.” There are fallen angels in the unseen realm serving Satan who God has allowed (for a season) to have HUGE INFLUENCE over mankind to do Satan’s deceptive bidding. Every one of us are engaged in this spiritual battle of good and evil. Our whole life. It is waged against our mind 24x7. Satan endlessly works at trying to get us to think CONTRARY to the way the Holy Spirit wants us to think and then act…WITHOUT GETTING CAUGHT AT IT!

For those who purpose to be victorious in this spiritual battle, God has given humanity His written Word (the Holy Bible) and the Holy Spirit to help them UNDERSTAND CORRECTLY the Bible and to help them control their thoughts and actions. After all, our actions follow our thoughts. Satan fully understands that, which is WHY he constantly strives to try to subtly manipulate what we think and then believe.

And after many years of walking with the Lord, I’ve learned that Jesus Christ wants first place in our lives daily, and Satan HATES IT when we give Jesus first place, and Satan has a myriad of ways to distract us if we let him. Jesus co-created each of us, so He can be fully trusted to help us live this life to the fullest in alignment with His Truth (The Holy Bible). Yet, He won’t force Himself upon us. We must demonstrate to Him that we daily desire His supernatural ability to guide our lives. As with any meaningful relationship, it requires our active pursuit. Our relationship with Jesus Christ is no different.

Yet Jesus only invites. He never forces anyone to give their all to Him. It’s a choice He wants everyone making, yet eternity will be filled with those who rejected Him. If you haven’t made a decision to trust the One who knows what is best for you, do yourself the biggest favor you could do. Be wise enough to place your trust in the One who paid full penalty for all your past, present, and future sins so you could be forgiven, justified, and made fully righteous in His eyes. He has plans to bless you and use you to co-reign with Him through eternity. Don’t spend eternity regretting what eternity could have been for you in and through Jesus Christ. Don’t reject His great free gift of eternal Salvation.

What will be your decision? You have no assurance of another heartbeat. None of us do. Be wise. Make Him your Savior and let Him be Lord in every area of your life. It is the wisest decision you will ever make.

This testimony is reprinted from THE REAL LIFE STORIES TESTIMONY BOOK Edition 6. To inquire about many different editions of THE REAL LIFE STORIES TESTIMONY BOOKS, be encouraged to click on the following link:  https://reallifestoriestestimonybooks.com

Norm Rasmussen is the founder of the evangelistic ministry of Precious Testimonies Evangelistic Ministries, Inc.

If you would like to read the born again testimony of Norm's wife, please click here:  Kathleen Rasmussen.

Dear Reader - are you at peace with God? If not, you can be. Do you know what awaits you when you die? You can have the assurance from God that heaven will be your home, if you would like to be certain. You can even have that assurance RIGHT NOW! Either Jesus Christ died for your sins, or He didn't (He did!). Are you prepared to stand before God on the Judgment Day and tell Him that you didn't need the shed blood of Jesus Christ on the Cross to have your sins forgiven and get in right-standing with God? We plead with you...please don't make such a tragic mistake.

To get to know God, to be at peace with God, to have your sins forgiven, to make certain heaven will be your home for eternity, to make certain that you are in right-standing with God right now ... please click here to help you understand the importance of being reconciled to God. What you do about being reconciled to God will determine where you will spend eternity, precious one. Your decision to be reconciled to God is the most important decision you'll ever make in this life, because in Christ, it is impossible to put a value on the worth of your soul in light of eternity.

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Remember: All that we do in this life comes back to our God-given purpose which is to serve and glorify God. The money and assets we accumulate, the fame and power we've attained or seek to attain - all of the things of this nature will one day pass away, but those lives of others we impact for Jesus Christ will last for eternity, and we will be rewarded for the part we helped play by impacting those lives ... for eternity. (Matthew 6:19-21 is our assurance)